Last weekend, I had the privilege of listening to a re-run of Dr. Henry Cloud giving his talk to the Global Leadership Summit about the Downward Spiral.  It’s an amazing talk and so I just had to share a few key points, because it’s so easy for anyone to get caught in a downward spiral, but also as small business owners who make a living trying to sell themselves and their services, it’s particularly helpful!  Henry explained that anytime you are out of control of the situation around you, it’s difficult to stay out of a downward spiral.  Now these factors could be anything, but maybe as creatives its things like: clients not booking as quickly, the economy falling (this can effect a lot of people), or any other problem that eventually leads us to feel inadequate, even though the situation is out of our control.

So when a situation like this arrives, our brain reads them in terms of the 3ps.

Personally- The brain allows you to convince yourself that it’s your fault.  Because this client didn’t book me, they must not like me.

Pervasively- The brain then continues to convince you that it’s not just that one client, it’s every client, which then eventually leads to the path of well, my whole life must just stink then!

Permanent- The brain then starts to think that it can never change.

So how do you get out of the fog you’ve been stuck in?  How do you stop your brain from seeing everything as a permanent problem?

1.  Write negative thoughts down and then prove them wrong… Dispute them with Truth.  God says that you are my workmanship.  Therefore, everything can’t be bad: Client A (whose been causing all the problems) might not like you, but Client B LOVES you!!

2. Get back in control!  Write a list of everything that seems to be overwhelming to you and divide that list into what you can control and what you can’t.  Then make a specific plan to control the things that you can control.  Maybe that’s little things like, my attitude, or how often I’m connecting with my clients.  Fill in your blank.  Implement these changes, daily, then weekly, then monthly, etc.

3.  Connect with other people.  When you are isolated, it’s a lot easier for your brain to convince you that things are the worst and super stressful.  Other people, even for the introverts out there, will refuel you because they know where you are.  Chances are that every single one of us has felt our lives in a downward spiral before, sometimes we just don’t want to admit it.  If you are struggling, find someone you trust and talk about it every week.  Love refuels no matter what, and you find that only in other people.

Amazing talk, right?  The struggle is so real for a lot of photographers who haven’t had a break all summer and are finding themselves a little burnt out.  The struggle is real for photographers who haven’t been shooting all summer.  The struggle is real for moms, dads, students, grandparents, colleagues, friends, spouses. This knowledge was just too good to keep to myself.  If you want more words of wisdom from Dr. Henry Cloud, he has a book called Boundaries for Leaders.  I can’t wait to get a copy of it!  Happy weekend, friends!